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WWE Raw Results: Highlights, Analysis, and Grades for February 13

Bryan Heaton
Bryan Heaton

Daily DDT

WWE Raw, Source: WWE.com

Raw was in Las Vegas this week. Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens had their Festival of Friendship, the Women’s Championship was on the line, plus more!

Previously on WWE Raw, Samoa Joe officially got a contract. One week after reinjuring Seth Rollins, Joe defeated Roman Reigns in the main event – with an assist from Braun Strowman.

Goldberg also made an appearance to accept Brock Lesnar’s challenge to a final match at WrestleMania. He did so by interrupting Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens, and ended up getting a Universal Title match at Fastlane.

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This week on Raw, the main selling point was the Women’s Championship match between Charlotte Flair and Bayley. The Hugger has pinned Charlotte on multiple occasions, but never with the title on the line. Did a showdown in Sin City spell victory for Bayley?

We also were treated to the first ever “Festival of Friendship” this week on Raw. Chris Jericho – perhaps guilty over accepting Goldberg’s challenge to Kevin Owens – wanted to show that he and KO were on the same page. With their friendship seemingly becoming a bit rocky, the #61MinuteMan wanted to show that they were as solid as ever. Did the Festival of Friendship work out as intended?

Oh, and Emmalina was finally scheduled to debut. Haha, good joke, guys!

Must Read: WWE WrestleMania Match Card Projections 7.0

Please continue reading for all the highlights and results from WWE Raw on February 13, 2017.

Stephanie McMahon Addresses the WWE Universe

Stephanie’s in charge tonight. *yawn*

This entire segment was a waste of time. Stephanie’s pandering to the audience is the worst thing in WWE. The whole world knows she’s supposed to be a heel, but in Vince McMahon’s mind there are no heels or faces. So she’s gotta try and get cheered and booed all the time, and none of her actions make sense.

Roman Reigns interrupts fairly quickly, demanding something as usual. I mean, it’s not like he’s ever not gotten what he wanted, so you can’t blame a guy for trying. But, to borrow a phrase from Tommy Boy, he’s a big dumb animal, isn’t he, folks? Why would you give away your master plan like a Bond villain? Stephanie may be insufferable, but she’s not stupid.

Then a random appearance by Gallows and Anderson? Sure, why not? I guess they did need to promote their new T-shirt that totally isn’t a ripoff of the Bullet Club, no sir. At least they understand how handicap matches work, unlike Dolph Ziggler and the SmackDown crew.

And to top it off, Stephanie can’t even get Teddy Long’s catchphrase right? All she had to do was wait for a random fourth person to wander onto the stage, and boom: you got a tag team match, playa.

I will say this: Mark Henry vs. Braun Strowman is a match I didn’t know I needed until I heard that announcement.

Roman Reigns vs. The Club (Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson), Handicap Match

Result: Roman Reigns defeated The Club via disqualification

Rating: 2.0 out of 5 stars

On the one hand, at least the Raw Tag Team Champions weren’t made to look like a bunch of wimps. As soon as Stephanie granted the handicap match, I had visions of Roman winning (to look strong, of course). Sure, Reigns is a former world champion, but he should not be defeating the Raw Tag Team Champions solo.

On the other hand, Roman Reigns just defeated the Raw Tag Team Champions solo.

Yes, it’s a disqualification for excessive punishment, but still. The point of the match was to punish Roman, right? Why not let The Club beat him through solid teamwork – since that’s what they are the champions of – and then let him make a comeback after the match? There’s no good reason to do the DQ finish here, because it accomplishes nothing. Roman looks no better – he still got his butt kicked. The Club looks like punks – they get a loss despite a 2-on-1 advantage.

But no, Roman gets to stand tall at the end of the segment. You know, because the Raw Tag Team Championships mean absolutely nothing. Why couldn’t this have been another team?

Oh, right, all the other good heel teams are either on SmackDown or in NXT.

Kofi Kingston (w/ Xavier Woods & Big E) vs. Bo Dallas

Result: Kofi Kingston defeated Bo Dallas via pinfall

Rating: 2.0 out of 5 stars

Poor Bo Dallas. His brother wins the WWE World Championship last night – pinning both John Cena and AJ Styles in the process. And Bo is a pawn in the New Day’s scheme to sell ice cream. Seems unfair to me.

HOWEVER, the sight of all three members of New Day reacting to Bo ripping up the blueprints was worth everything that came before it in the episode. If Xavier Woods will react like that every week, I’ll take Roman Reigns stupidly winning handicap matches every episode.

The match itself wasn’t really anything special. It’s always good to see Bo in action, and he looked pretty good even in limited time. Kofi looked good, too, which is to be expected. Decent palette cleanser of a match.

Is anyone else actually a little worried about the possibility of New Day ice cream? Cereal was one thing, but ice cream under hot stage lights? That’s going to be messy, folks.

Neville and Jack Gallagher Backstage

If the feud between Gallagher and Neville is a way to get weird British slang over, bring it on, guvna. I have zero idea what a pellick is, or if that’s even what Gallagher said, but I’ll take three weeks of Britspeak lessons on Mondays/Tuesdays. Kudos to Neville for putting the kibosh on Shakespeare – I’ve always found the Bard to be pretentious and overrated.

Noam Dar (w/ Alicia Fox) vs. Jack Gallagher

Result: Jack Gallagher defeated Noam Dar via pinfall

Rating: 2.0 out of 5 stars

In classic WWE fashion, the greatest thing about Noam Dar – his pronunciation of “Fox” – is now being usurped by the commentary crew. It’ll be dead on arrival by the beginning of March, if it even lasts that long.

Another negative on this match – the announce team spent the first part of the match putting Austin Aries over. Yes, he’s a terrific wrestler, but right now he’s a broadcaster. If you want to put him over, let him get back in the ring – he’s cleared for action. Don’t take away from what the division is doing in the ring.

The match itself is typical WWE cruiserweight fare. It’s frustrating in its dullness, you know? Both guys are capable of so much more, but all of these 205 Live segments on Raw are just so bland. There’s not much to say because there’s not much going on.

Here’s what I wish WWE would realize: The whole point of a separate cruiserweight division is to make it stand out from everything else. Right now, the only thing that makes the division stand out is the amount of time it takes to put purple tape on the ropes. Not the best calling card.

Neville comes down after the match, and does nothing because even he’s disinterested in the division.

Who’s In That Limo?

Aw, look at The Creator carpooling with The Destroyer. That’s good for the environment!

Emmalina

SEGMENT OF THE NIGHT RIGHT HERE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

Snark aside, I feel bad for Emma. She clearly wanted absolutely no part in whatever this debacle turned into. It’s sad, because what she was doing before she got hurt was tremendous.

I don’t know if this was the plan all along for Emmalina. Gosh, I hope not. If it was, I really hope someone is getting reassigned from the writing team. This was an awful idea.

Let’s hope that something gets salvaged from this, and Emma ends up in the Women’s Title picture before too long.

Bayley Backstage

Gambling terminology, rambling promo, lots of high energy? Yes sir, we’re definitely in Las Vegas tonight. At least Bayley is admitting that she’s nervous.

It’s also great to see the women get the main event spot tonight. It’s a title match, and there’s not a whole lot else going on in the episode. Why not go out on a high note?

Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho

After an impressive display of being multi-lingual, the best friends were interrupted by Triple H. The Game wanted to speak alone with KO. Is there something brewing with the COO and the Universal Champion? Stay tuned.

Braun Strowman vs. Mark Henry

Result: Braun Strowman defeated Mark Henry via pinfall

Rating: 2.0 out of 5 stars

Earlier I said this was a match I didn’t realize I needed. The excitement I initially had for it disappeared fairly quickly, though. Part of the problem is I want to see 2017 Braun Strowman against 2011-12 Mark Henry.

I love Mark Henry. It’s impossible not to. The guy has done so much in his career – good, bad, and hand birthing. He deserves every benefit of the doubt. But tonight, he looked slower than usual, and things just weren’t clicking for me.

Strowman is a monster, though, and all this match existed for was to prove that. Henry got some good offense in, and Strowman got to show some vulnerability as a result. Seeing Braun need to make a comeback is terrifically frightening, because now there’s nothing he can’t do.

Of course, Roman Reigns can’t follow simple orders, and he does what he wants when he wants, so he shows up after the match. Braun gets the upper hand because he had the high ground, much like Obi-Wan Kenobi on Mustafar. Roman gets the bigger man reeling, but a spear countered into the running powerslam ends the threat. It also opens up several possibilities for direction of the Fastlane match.

Oh, who am I kidding – Roman’s ending Braun’s run of dominance, isn’t he?

Samoa Joe Exclusive Interview

Man, Joe is tremendous at these sit-down interviews.

Every word he says has a purpose, and they’re all delivered with conviction. Joe is the kind of guy that could make reading the phone book seem interesting.

What makes his words really connect with the audience is that there’s some built-in truth and reality. Nothing Joe is saying is really wrong, or a lie. He’s 100% correct that no one in WWE wanted him for 18 years. He truly believes that he’s different from all of Triple H’s previous partners in crime. And he’s convinced that he’s a million times better than Sami Zayn. More on that in a bit.

The big thing is that he makes even the most innocuous statements seem crazy intimidating. No mere mortal should be anything but terrified when speaking with Samoa Joe. The only thing missing from this whole saga is William Regal being on Raw. He and Joe need to interact again, it’s always great.

Tag Team Chaos Backstage

The friendship between Bayley, Sheamus, and Cesaro is adorable. I like that Cesaro is somehow the straight man, which makes Sheamus the comedic relief. I also appreciate Sheamus having the wherewithal to come back from his verbal slip. Good stuff.

I don’t know about the motives of Enzo and Cass, though. You know Cesaro and Sheamus are mad at losing their championship rematch last week. And Enzo and Cass kind of caused that loss. They’re poking the hornet’s nest right now, and I don’t think it’s gonna work for them.

Sami Zayn vs. Rusev (w/ Lana)

Result: Sami Zayn defeated Rusev via pinfall

Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars

Hey, look: Sami Zayn is an underdog! When has that ever happened?

After almost an hour and a half of uninspired, mediocre at best wrestling, these two had what seemed like a match of the year in contrast. It shouldn’t be surprising that two talented guys like this could do great things in the ring.

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Sami is at his best when he can scarily sell shots to the head like he’s been concussed. That’s kind of a weird thing to praise in 2017 with all the knowledge we have on head injuries. But Sami makes Rusev’s kicks look like they caused severe damage. That accomplishes two things: Rusev looks like a legit beast, and Sami looks even better when he can come back from it. So many wrestlers just want to look good dishing out punishment, they don’t think about looking good taking punishment. Sami does, and he does it better than almost anyone.

Following the match, Sami gets Chekhov’s Interview on the Stage with Charly Caruso. He ties up a bunch of story threads – his loss last week, his status as an underdog, puts Rusev over as an opponent, and even addresses Joe’s comments from earlier. It’s like Sami Zayn is the only person who understands that his segments don’t happen in a vacuum, you know?

But apparently Samoa Joe is like Beetlejuice, and if you talk about him long enough he shows up to destroy you. That’s a handy piece of information to have. Clearly, someone has seen the great matches Zayn and Joe had in NXT, and are pushing towards recreating that on Raw. I’m in!

Teddy Long Entering Hall of Fame

Let me holla at ya, playa.

Personally, I think this is an odd choice, but Teddy is definitely deserving in a kayfabe sense. He was the General Manager of SmackDown for forever, after a good career as a manager and a referee.

Hopefully there’s plenty of Haterade at the induction ceremony, and everyone will be thuggin’ and buggin’ into the wee hours of the morning.

Akira Tozawa vs. Ariya Daivari

Result: Akira Tozawa defeated Ariya Daivari via pinfall

Rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars

I said it last week, but Tozawa is the best chance at saving the cruiserweight division on Raw. He’s currently one of the only “different” things in a division that’s supposed to be something different but is really just more of the same.

As far as matches go, it was a bit better than the earlier 205 Live segment. It was a different style of match, but Tozawa and his incredible quickness gave it a feeling of urgency that was lacking from the Gallagher/Dar clash. I don’t know if “urgency” is the best word for what I’m saying, but when he’s in the ring Tozawa seems to do everything at a double time speed.

Having The Brian Kendrick on commentary adds something, too. He is 100% convinced that Tozawa is his protege, despite the fact that he never once has acknowledged his presence. But if it gives Kendrick a reason to come out and run down the cruiserweights, I’ll allow it.

The Festival of Friendship

First things first, as a fan of “The Rock, This is Your Life,” I absolutely loved how this whole thing started. Showgirls, sequins, a glittery fedora, big band swing music, a cheesy smile on Jericho’s face – it’s basically the best thing ever.

Then, you get KO’s reaction to the whole thing. The look on his face was equal parts disgust, exasperation, and confusion. The artwork was amazing, and I need a copy of “The Creation of Kevin” for my man cave. (Seriously, my birthday is coming up, so if anyone likes what they read and wants to help a brother out, hit me up.)

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any better, THERE’S A MAGICIAN. FROM CRAIGSLIST. WHO MADE THE LIST. It was just A+ work all around.

Of course, the entire presentation is an excuse for Jericho to call out Goldberg. Sadly, he still has not called him Greenberg, but there’s still three weeks to Fastlane.

BUT IT’S ANOTHER SWERVE, AND IT’S GILLBERG BECAUSE THIS IS THE GREATEST SEGMENT IN PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING HISTORY. This is Your Life may have the better ratings, but Festival of Friendship is the greatest thing ever filmed in front of a wrestling audience.

The piece de resistance was the “new list,” even though it’s so sad to see these two ending their friendship. Well, Owens is ending everything, at least. It was inevitable, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. I’m assuming this is what Triple H was talking to Owens about earlier in the evening, but who knows? And why?

Enzo Amore (w/ Big Cass) vs. Cesaro (w/ Sheamus)

Result: Cesaro defeate Enzo Amore via pinfall

Rating: 2.0 out of 5 stars

Raise your hand if you ever thought in a million years that this was a match we’d ever see on Raw.

Interesting that Enzo would bring props to the ring for his pre match antics. Although, being in Vegas, I’m guessing Carrot Top can’t be too far away. And there’s a lot of other words to describe marshmallows, Colin – delicious, for one.

If we’re being completely honest, this match should have been no more than 12 seconds. Enzo charges Cesaro, he gets uppercutted out of his Jordans, and then a 1-2-3. But since Enzo and Cass are working their way towards a Raw Tag Team Championship match, that can’t happen.

It doesn’t mean that Enzo is going to win, though. Cesaro is an accomplished singles wrestler, while Enzo is at his best in a tag team. It’s a total mismatch even before factoring in the size and strength advantage. I’d venture a guess that even speed is a push, because Cesaro is deceptively quick and agile.

After the match, Sheamus and Cass have some words. Obviously, this is a way to build to someone to challenge against Gallows and Anderson for the Raw Tag Team Titles. Perhaps a three-way at Fastlane with all three teams?

Raw Women’s Championship Match
Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Bayley

Result: Bayley defeated Charlotte Flair via pinfall to become the new Raw Women’s Champion

Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars

Prior to the match, Charlotte met up with Sasha Banks backstage. The longtime rivals exchanged words, with Charlotte seeming to think she got the better of the exchange. I’m sure that won’t come into play later!

The match itself seemed to get off to a slow start. It’s always baffled me that the final match of a three hour show would start off slow. The crowd is tired, but they want to be excited – give them a reason! Collar and elbow tie-ups have their place, but not so many so early in the main event. Just my opinion, keep things moving at a quick pace.

I like that Bayley has kind of turned into a modern, female Hulk Hogan. She starts eating a ton of offense, but then she hulks up (hugs up?) like it was nothing. It’s a great character trait for her, like her eternal optimism fuels her to make that comeback. In a cynical world full of pessimists (like me!), something like that can go a long way.

Of course, Charlotte comes back fairly quickly to regain the edge. The schoolgirl rollup into the turnbuckle looked insanely nasty. Then the moonsault off the barricade (in front of MLB star Bryce Harper, who seemed excited) seemed to be almost a knockout blow.

It’s worth pointing out that Bayley has a beautiful elbow drop, like her hero Randy Savage. Personally, I think it’s better than most other flying elbows out there.

The end of the match was such a schmozz that it actually took me out of the moment. Believe me, as a guy who was dressed in full Bayley get-up when she beat Sasha Banks in Brooklyn for the NXT Women’s Championship, I’m thrilled she’s the Raw Women’s Champion right now. But how much sweeter would it have been if it was like Brooklyn – a clean victory, with no question about who should have won?

So now we have a new Raw Women’s Champion in Bayley. She doesn’t know that Sasha Banks gave her an assist. Charlotte has beef with both Bayley and Sasha. And Dana Brooke is back from wherever she disappeared to to be in Charlotte’s corner again. With Emma back from injury, plus Nia Jax destroying everyone, the Raw women’s division is a busy place.

Related Story: WWE Rumors: Bayley and Charlotte Plans for WrestleMania 33

What did you think of this week’s episode of Raw?

Bryan Heaton

Bryan Heaton

Bryan lives on Long Island with his wife and a pug, and more often than not there's some form of wrestling or another playing on the TV or computer. Follow him on Twitter @BigHeat34 to talk about WWE, NXT, or Chikara (seriously, wrestling ice creams and wrestling ants are AMAZING), or introduce him to your favorite promotions or matches!