WWE Raw: Results, Highlights, and Analysis for August 13, 2018

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BIG STAKES FOR THE BIG DOG (whatever that means)

The streak lives on: Roman Reigns, for what seems like the millionth time in a row, delivers a passable promo that doesn’t cause anyone to cringe. He’s come a long way from “sufferin’ succotash” and calling himself “THE Guy.”

Reigns gets to the point quick: He aims to make every place he visits better than when he arrived. Brock Lesnar’s general existence has prevented him from doing that for WWE, so Roman is angry.

Enter Paul Heyman, who once again elevates anyone around him just by knowing what works and what doesn’t. When Heyman enters the ring, it’s a scene right out of Faust — Heyman offers to advocate for Reigns, and tell him every single one of Brock Lesnar’s secrets, weaknesses, whatever he needs to win the Universal Title.

Reigns refuses, because he — wisely — doesn’t trust a single fiber of Heyman’s being. There’s no reason for Reigns to fall for anything Heyman says. That is, until family comes up. Apparently, Heyman learned some sort of family lesson from Roman’s dad, Sika — after repeating it to Roman in Samoan, Reigns is understandably thrown.

And that’s when, just like in every deal with the devil, things take a turn. Heyman gives Reigns a “tentative business agreement” to think about — and whips out a can of pepper spray and empties it in Roman’s face. Let me tell you from experience, pepper spray is no fun, y’all.

Just when you think it’s over, here comes Brock Lesnar to put a beatdown on Reigns, who has as much vision as the Avengers post-Thanos. Clearly, this was all part of the plan, but there’s one thing bugging me:

How on earth can anyone cheer Lesnar, regardless of your feelings about Reigns?