Predicting WWE WrestleMania 33’s Winners

WWE.com

John Cena & Nikki Bella vs. The Miz & Maryse

Is there anything that really needs to be said about this match?

There’s no way John Cena and Nikki Bella are losing this bout. Cena has been Vince’s golden boy for over a decade, and Nikki Bella’s the focal point of everything related to WWE’s bizarre version of reality TV. Even though both of them are in the twilights of their respective careers, neither one will lose at WrestleMania.

For the most inexplicable of reasons, Vince McMahon thinks that Cena proposing to Nikki will be as big as ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage proposing to Miss Elizabeth. The problem is, nobody cares about their personal life. Everything about them has been shown on Total Divas, to the point that there’s more apathy towards their private lives than genuine interest. Yet despite that, Vince thinks this is a better idea than the one dream match everyone wanted to see in John Cena vs. the Undertaker.

As for the Miz, they’re soon going to find themselves in the same place as A.J. Styles was in two months ago. Even though he talks a lot and speaks the truth, it will all be for naught as Cena’s still going to win, because that’s what he does, all the time.

Winners: John Cena and Nikki Bella