Smackdown! – 5/14/10

Smackdown is back on the air, and I dread it because we may have to deal with another rant about the accolades of the World Champion.  Would this week bore us to death or actually be entertaining?  Find out what happened right here:

EDITORS NOTE: Once again I have to apologize for the crappy network in my area that carries Smackdown.  They moved it to Saturday AGAIN!!!  I think this is like the FN fifth or sixth time in the past two months now.  DAMMIT!

Video Package: Last week, Matt Hardy is attacked by Drew McIntyre and is relentless about it that it forces GM Teddy Long to strip McIntyre of the Intercontinental Title and fire him!

Teddy Long is in the ring with the Intercontinental Title and he announces that the following match is the finals of the IC Title Tournament.

IC Title Match
Kofi Kingston vs. Christian
WINNER: Kingston via pin fall after hitting Trouble in Paradise to become the NEW IC Champion

• After match, the celebration is interrupted by Drew McIntyre who hands a note to Teddy Long.  Teddy reads the note silently and then looks disgusted.  He looks at Kofi and asks for the belt back.  Kofi is pissed and reluctantly gives it up.  Long gives it back to McIntyre who walks away proud.

Matt Striker grabbed the letter during the break and reads it aloud to the WWE Universe.  It was from Vince McMahon and it overruled Teddy Long’s decision to fire and strip McIntyre of the title.

Video Package: Over the last few weeks, the Big Show has gotten the best of the World Champion, Jack Swagger.

Backstage: Jack Swagger is overseeing crew members removing boxes from a moving truck.

Shad Gaspard vs. Jesse Guyver
WINNER: Gaspard via pin after hitting the STO

The Dude Busters (Caylen Croft & Trent Barreta) vs. MVP & JTG
WINNERS: MVP & JTG via pin fall after MVP hit the 305 on Barreta

Backstage: CM Punk admonishing the Straightedge Society, but he forgives them for their doubt because last week Rey Mysterio was trying to poison their minds and tonight he’ll beat Rey on his own.

Jack Swagger comes to the ring to gloat about his accolades again (JOY!).  This time the crew brought out all of Swagger’s trophies and memorabilia from over the years.  Swagger rants on and on for what seems like forever, even through a commercial.

• Big Show thankfully interrupts the segment.  Swagger is worried that Show’s going to break something of his, which is exactly what happens “by accident.”
• Swagger tries to attack Show and the big man throws him out of the ring.  He progresses to destroy every item in the ring.
• Swagger looks like he’s trying to hold back tears.

Beth Phoenix looks like she’s going to wrestle against Rosa Mendes, but Vickie Guerrero comes out and makes the most random match ever that has to do with Michelle McCool cashing in her rematch clause, but it’s part handicap match, part triple threat because Layla is in it as well.

Women’s Title Match
LayCool vs. Beth Phoenix (Champion)
WINNER: Layla via pin fall on Beth to become the NEW Women’s Champion

Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero
WINNER: Kane via pin fall after hitting a Choke Slam

Backstage: Teddy Long is in his office when Drew McIntyre joins him.  Teddy says to him, “You can get anything you want around here, huh?  Well I had a change of heart.  I’m going to give you something, a match next week one on one against the Big Show.

Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk
WINNER: Mysterio via DQ

• Mid match, Luke Gallows came out to the ring to try and attack Rey to no avail.  The masked person jumps in the ring and it’s revealed to be Serena.  The “real” masked person jumps Rey from behind and hits a swinging neck breaker.  Gallows then hits the Gallow’s Pole, followed up by Punk hitting the GTS.
• Punk and all three SES members replicate a pledge to be straightedge holding Rey’s broken body and his hands up and over his heart.

QUICK THOUGHTS:

I knew some bull shit was going to go down with McIntyre.  He’s one of those characters you knew when you were a kid who didn’t get his way and then took his ball and went home like a little bitch!  That whole segment afterward stole all the thunder that great match had!

JTG and MVP as a tag team..?  Well that’s an oddity.  MVP a reformed criminal, and JTG formerly of Cryme Tyme who stole things and then sold them to people.  That makes a lot of sense WWE! (SARCASM)

Once again Jack Swagger bores us to death with another long and drawn out promo segment.  One of these days I would like to see the minute by minute ratings on Smackdown because I have a strong hunch that almost every TV in the country either changes channel or clicks off when Swagger’s face is on their screen.

I’m so sick of women’s wrestling right now.  Both WWE and TNA women’s divisions are an embarrasment to the industry!

I was hoping tonight would be the night we get to see the identity of the masked assailant of the SES.  Damn!  My best guess, we’ll see who it is at Over The Limit.