Monday Night Raw – 5/17/10

Last night, Monday Night RAW went commercial free!  Two plus hours of RAW with no breaks in between, with this being the last RAW before Over The Limit… Could make for some interesting events..?  Find out what happened here:

Bret Hart comes to the ring to address the fact that he’s been challenged to a US Title match tonight by The Miz.  He told officials that he accepted it and that’s why he’s here, but in the past few days he’s changed his mind because he “doesn’t want to be on of those old wrestlers who hangs on for too long!”

• Interrupted by Chris Jericho who asks Bret why he came back to the WWE in the first place?  Comments that he’s tainting his legacy and that Bret is a hypocrite!
• Bret responds to Jericho’s comments by telling him to look into a mirror.
• Jericho comes back, “I’ve looked into a mirror and I saw a man who’s better than you ever were… your fans are seeing what you’ve become… your name means nothing anymore!”  Makes more comments trying to bait Bret into the match with Miz.
• Bret decides to accept the match again, but Jericho isn’t finished.  Tries to bait Bret into a No DQ/No count out match.  Bret wouldn’t have it any other way.

Video Package: WWE’s version of a mock commercial, poking fun at Geico.  It features The Great Khali in a tiny car, and Hornswoggle getting a hummer.

Edge comes to the ring for his Pick Your Poison match in which Randy Orton, his opponent this weekend, picks his opponent tonight.  He decides to cut a promo on Orton when he’s interrupted by Christian.

Pick Your Poison
Edge vs. Christian
WINNER: Edge via pin fall after hitting a Spear

• Post match, Orton appears on the tron… “Great win, but why is Christian out there?  That’s not who you’re facing tonight…::LIGHTS OUT::  The Undertaker walks to the ring.

Pick Your Poison
Edge vs. The Undertaker
WINNER: Taker via count out after Edge walked out.

• Post match, Christian grabbed Edge and threw him back in the ring so Taker could Choke Slam him.

Backstage: Maryse in makeup dogging Trish Stratus who’s on the cover of some Canadian magazine.  She then turns her disrespect to the Diva Champion Eve Torres, not realizing she snuck in the room.  Eve dumps powder on her head and they brawl.

Backstage: Guest Host, Buzz Alrdin and his wife are in their office talking when Vickie Guerrero walks in to introduce herself.  She says there’s a mistake because they’re in her office.  Buzz puts her in her place saying he walked on the moon, and she walked out as GM of RAW.  Also informs her that next week her replacement will be here.

• The Bella Twins are asked to escort her out.

Mark Henry on the way to the ring for a match is attacked by his opponent, Batista, from behind.  Batista absolutely destroys him using the post and the steel stairs.

Video Package: Last December at the TLC PPV, Sheamus defeated John Cena to become WWE Champion.  Preview of tonight’s main event.

Video Package: Another mock commercial this time making fun of Master Card and their priceless campaign.  Poking fun at Ted DiBiase, and saying for everything else, there’s the truth… R-Truth.

Ted DiBiase with Virgil vs. Yoshi Tatsu
WINNER: DiBiase via pin fall after hitting Dream Street

• Post match, DiBiase has Virgil get him the mic.  “Hey R-Truth.  You know who’s NOT ashamed to be the new Virgil?  The original Virgil!  He’ll be in my corner this Sunday when I beat you!”

Backstage: Chris Jericho and The Miz plotting something.  Miz walks away and steals a microphone from Josh Matthews.  “People asked me why challenge Bret Hart?  I say, why not!  I can defeat a legend, a hall of famer and a national hero with a single victory…”

• Miz is now headed to the ring (with no music and mic still in hand).  “Bret Hart, you cost me my Unified Tag Team Title… I’m going to humiliate and embarrass you so much that I eradicate the Hart Family name and spit on the Hart heritage…”  Miz then vows to make Bret tap out to the Sharp Shooter.

US Title Match – No DQ/No Count Out
The Miz (Champion) vs. Bret Hart
WINNER: Hart via submission to become the NEW United States Champion

• Mid match, Miz had his insurance policy come out to protect him from The Hart Dynasty in the form of William Regal & Vladimir Kozlov.
• Later in the match Chris Jericho came out to help Miz and Natalya slapped the taste out of his mouth.
• Miz was setting Bret for the Sharp Shooter when The Hart Dynasty broke through and hit Miz with The Hart Attack.  Bret slapped on the Sharp Shooter and it was all over.

Video Package: Two weeks ago, Sheamus attacked John Cena.  Another preview for later tonight.

Video Package: Another crappy commercial this time mocking Dos Equis beer with Santino Marella as the most irritating man in the world!

Maryse, Layla & Michelle McCool vs. Eve Torres & The Bella Twins
WINNERS: Maryse & LayCool via pin fall after Maryse hit the French Kiss on one of the Bellas

Backstage: Josh Matthews with Cena who calls into question Cena’s decision making as of late… Asks why tonight against Sheamus?

• Cena tells the crowd he has a plan to take Sheamus out so that he won’t be involved this Sunday.  He vows that Batista will NEVER make him say I QUIT.

Pick Your Poison Match (Edge pick for Orton)
Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger
WINNER: Orton via DQ after Edge ran in

• Orton tried hitting RKO on Edge who pushed him into Swagger for an RKO.  Edge followed up with a Spear on Orton.

Jerry Lawler & Michael Cole run down the card for Over The Limit this Sunday.

Guest Host, Buzz Aldrin, to the ring.  He advocates to the crowd how we need to do more with the space program.

• Interrupted by Zack Ryder & Alicia Fox.  Ryder tells him, “Like Canadians even have a space program.  Their science peaked at the invention of maple syrup.”  Calls the moon landing a fake!
• Aldrin shows a video package of the last guy who said that to his face… He socked the guy in the jaw!

Evan Bourne & Gail Kim with Buzz Aldrin vs. Zack Ryder & Alicia Fox
WINNERS: Bourne & Gail via pin fall after Gail hit Alicia with Eat Defeat Jaw Breaker

Video Package: Another WWE mock commercial making fun of Geico where Goldust is on a blind date, creeping the hell out of the woman.

Non-Title Match
John Cena vs. Sheamus
WINNER: Cena via DQ after Batista ran in

• Batista hits Cena with three Spine Busters and then locks on that same submission he used on Mark Henry last week, the hybrid cross face/abdominal stretch, trying to get Cena to say “I Quit” as RAW goes off the air.

QUICK THOUGHTS:

Match of the night has to go to Christian and Edge.  It was just great!  Total back and forth match up and I seriously thought that Christian was going to pull it out there a few times.

SIGN OF THE NIGHT: Muhammad Hassan for guest host! – I laughed when I saw that one.  If you’ve forgotten or don’t know who he was, Hassan was a stereotypical Middle Eastern character in the 2000s who got a lot of heat for looking like a terrorist.

The mock commercials weren’t all bad.  I like the Khali and Santino commercials.

Bret Hart is the US Champion again… That was unexpected.  I wonder if he’ll have the US Title with him at the WrestleFest 2010 convention that’s this weekend in California.  Oh, and if you missed it, Bret in the opening promo said WWF instead of WWE… WHOOPS!

If you’ve never seen the Buzz Aldrin video, punching the guy who called him a liar about the moon landing, here it is: