Impact Wrestling: Results, Review, and Grades for November 29th

Matt Sydal and Ethan Page are backstage, mulling over the existential realities of how their partnership just isn’t working as well as it should be. Matt subtly/not-so-subtly hints that it’s time to go their separate ways, and next week during the Ultimate X tournament, they two will face-off against one another.

Tommy Dreamer vs. E. Li. Drake. ( I had to)

It’s hard for me, because – do I root for Tommy Dreamer, ECW legend of one of my all-time favorites, or do I root for Eli Drake, because y’all need to get over the millennials argument?

Eli calls a very quick time out to talk smack to Tommy’s face, and then he just lays into him with strikes. Tommy counters Eli in a corner, and then he bites Eli in the forehead.

Eli freaking forfeits the match! He crawls up the ring, waving his hands, saying “I’m done”, and he loses via count-out!

However, Josh Matthews gets on the mic and announces that Impact has decided they’re going to restart this match, and this time, it’s a no DQ.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Eli Drake… again.

The match is already going up the ramp by time we get back from commercial. Eli Drake drinks a beer (doesn’t touch his lips the the can, though) while he waits for Dreamer to come back with a garbage can full of tools, so maybe this is an ECW match.

Dreamer puts the ring bell on Drake’s groin and hits it. Yeah, this is ECW pretty much.

After Dream takes someone’s cane and puts it up Drake’s rear end, Eli finally gets in some offense and lands a suplex on Dreamer on the ramp. Eli hits Dreamer with a traffic cone before sling-shotting him onto the bottom hope.

You can hear someone say, “how do you pick the weakest weapon out of the bunch?” This Vegas crowd has stolen their fair share of moments tonight.

Dreamer introduces a steal chair, which he kicks into Drake’s face, and then Drake DDT’s Dreamer onto it.

Dreamer gets a two-and-a-half off of a DDT, but Drake low-blows him and sends him flying into a trash can. Drake hits the Gravy Train, but Dreamer kicks out! Apparently, no one else has ever done that before!

Eli Drake gets the three-count and picks up the win, and millennials everywhere tweeted about it and went back to their business, thank you very much.

Grade: Not the hardest of the hardcore matches, but it had some good, old school spots that are always enjoyable.

That’s it for our Impact coverage for the evening. Thank you for burning the midnight oil with us, and be sure to tune in with us for more Impact live review and grades next week! Thank you, and goodnight!