WWE SmackDown Smacks and Downs: Bayley vs. Charlotte furthers Sasha Banks feud

Down: a cringe-inducing, channel-turning opening segment

Can someone please try to explain to me how the opening segment was any good? It was downright horrendous.

I’ll give credit to The Miz and Morrison for playing their roles as grating heels well. Even when given literal crap like last night, they wholeheartedly buy into their characters and segments, doing their best to sell it to the audience.

I think I may have seen the most genuine, authentic reaction from The Miz ever when he exasperatedly muttered, “Damn it,” under his breath after Strowman agreed to face The Miz at Morrison’s behest all while The Miz was trying to talk Morrison out of the challenge.

Besides that, everything else should have been edited out (it was a taped episode). The horrid skit revealing the puppets that were rejected for the “Firefly Fun House” but still favored over Strowman was just another example of a certain higher-up (*cough* Vince McMahon *cough*) just loving fart and poop humor. It was just bad.

I thought it would improve once Strowman interrupted, but then I remember he’s a stiff actor. Stiff is probably underselling his acting in the segment last night. At least they’re giving him the space to succeed or fail.

It took 15 minutes before the first bell rang for a match, and that match lasted about three to four minutes. Strowman handily beat The Miz (as he should) with his running powerslam.

Does this do anything for either act? No. We expect Strowman to have little issue with someone booked as a middling singles wrestler turned tag team specialist in The Miz. Sure, The Miz had some offense, but we all knew it was a futile effort leading to an inevitable end.

What’s worse is that we now know Strowman’s match at Backlash won’t be against Wyatt/The Fiend, but instead the duo of The Miz and Morrison in a handicap match for the Universal Championship. I mean, just…

Remember the last time Strowman defended a championship in a handicap match? He lost the now-vacant Intercontinental Champion in a match against The Artist Collective in Cesaro, Nakamura, and rightful champion Sami Zayn.

Unless this turns into a long-term story of Strowman constantly losing championships or major opportunities in handicap matches because of his arrogance as the “Monster among Men,” then I don’t know why this match was booked.

Here I thought them bringing up Wyatt after completely ignoring him last week was a step towards Strowman facing The Fiend. I guess we’ll have to wait.

If you made it through the opening segment without turning the channel or doing something else, I applaud you. It was backbreaking work to watch those first 12 minutes. At least the rest of the show was (mostly) an entertaining watch.

Next week sees the semi-final matches in the Intercontinental Championship Tournament when Hardy faces Bryan and Styles faces Elias. See you next week to see if my predictions came true!