WWE: In Memory of Mitch the Plant

Tragedy once again struck the squared circle as Dean Ambrose’s beloved houseplant Mitch was taken from us much too soon on WWE Raw.

Despite years of intense training and physical conditioning, a WWE ring is still a dangerous place for the men and women and plants of professional wrestling. As fans found out on Monday’s edition of RAW in St. Louis, sometimes you get more than you pay for. The crowd was already saddened by the cancellation of the popular Ambrose Asylum interview series and a dejected Dean Ambrose was taking Mitch to the back for some much needed rest. At Stephanie McMahon’s request, an enraged Chris Jericho came to the ring and proceeded to engage in fisticuffs with Ambrose.

That’s when tragedy struck.

Jericho and Ambrose brawled on the outside of the ring while Mitch and Stephanie watched helplessly – but safely – out of harms way. Or so we thought. In a moment that can only be described as “temporary insanity”, Jericho broke kayfabe and grabbed Mitch, using him as a weapon against a helpless Dean Ambrose.

Mitch suffered multiple fractures to his pot and stems along with several hairline fractures to his leaves and shoot. The first botanist to arrive on the scene said that the injuries were too extensive and there was nothing he could do. After vomiting several times, the botanist was quoted as saying, “after all these years in the field you’d think I’d be used to something like this but it never gets any easier. I feel like a stupid rookie.” Then he vomited again.

Mitch was no stranger to the spotlight. His breakout role was as “houseplant” in the 1994 girl-meets-assassin film, The Professional alongside Jean Reno and Natalie Portman. Mitch performed his own stunts for the film, which involved being carried around a lot and being dropped several stories down a crawlspace. After years of appearances on various TV sitcoms, a two-week relationship with Kim Kardashian and a stint in rehab for Miracle-Gro addiction, Mitch was ready to try his roots in the WWE. He rose so quickly through the ranks of NXT that no one even noticed he was there and he soon found himself paired with Ambrose with plans to make a run for the tag team titles at SummerSlam.

Ambrose could not be reached for comment but his isolation is understandable considering how close he was with Mitch. There were even talking of reforming The Shield with Mitch as the strong, silent member but those plans will now remain little more than whispers of a dream. In true fashion, the WWE Universe was quick to react to the tragic news and started a memorial Facebook page as well as a stirring video tribute. Personally, I would have gone with Enya.

Our condolences go out to the Ambrose family. #RIPMitch

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