RISE ASCENT Episodes 4, 5: Killer Death Machines vs. Doom/Blackheart

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EPISODE 5

I decided to combine these in part because episode 5 is a bit light on the wrestling, but puts a lot of time into building up excitement for RISE 8 and Rise of the Knockouts. I won’t be reviewing the video packages for those events as they’ll be out of date by the time you read this, but they are very cool and I encourage you to check them out. On to the graps:

“DOUBLE D” ROSE VS MIRANDA ALIZE

The Weapon of Ass Destruction returns. I am going to be honest about the fact that I feel a little weird about calling her that, but if anybody in this word is proud of the hinder-based havoc they can wreak in a wrestling ring, it’s Double D Rose. I mean, the first thing she did was get the audience to chant “Butt!” as she got into the ring. It’s her gimmick, and she’s owning it, and I support it.

But there’s more than the gimmick to Rose- she’s a legit threat in the ring, and it’s a lot of fun to watch her try to outwork and outsmark Alize. Rose starts the match by tricking Alize into a “butt-off”, which I guess is a butt-based dance contest? It doesn’t really matter because the whole thing was just a ruse to distract Alize enough to get her into a waistlock. From there, the story of the match was Alize trying to land holds and moves while she was tossed around by the bigger, stronger Rose. Alize has some pretty awesome moves, including a killer dropkick you can see from space. It’s bonkers. Rose used her butt as a weapon and as a shield, no-selling Alize’s kicks and propelling her across the ring. Yes it was silly, but this is the sport that gave Joey Ryan’s crotch near-mythical strength and power, so I think it’s all fair. In the end Rose missed a butt-slam and that winded her, allowing Alize to get the pin. But the crowd liked them both, and it was a fun match. I look forward to seeing more of these guys in RISE.

KATIE ARQUETTE VS NICOLE SAVOY

It’s time for Katie Arquette to make good on her claim that nobody in the RISE locker room can beat her. She called a hell of a shot by challenging Nicole Savoy.

Arquette started out big-timing Savoy, giving the ref a clapboard and demanding he calls the scene. But Savoy took the leading role fast. Savoy is a great mat wrestler, and she immediately started to work Arquette into a series of painful holds and twists that reminded me of the worst things you’ll see Pete Dunne do to an unlucky opponent. Arquette countered with a surprisingly vicious offense, kicking and striking Savoy and showing off a pretty cool leg sweep, but that only inspired Savoy to bust out her killer variety of suplexes. This was a squash similar to Kikyo’s match in episode 4, but both wrestlers came out looking great regardless. Savoy is one of the most technically impressive wrestlers on the indies today, and it wasn’t a shock when she won this one with her cool submission hold, but it was a lot tougher for her than I thought it would be.

Arquette lost, but it was an impressive match for her anyway. Nobody expected her to win, but she gave Savoy a run for her money. With her growing talent and awesome promo skills, she’ll be bringing a lot to a roster very soon. I hope we see more of her in RISE!

SHOTZI BLACKHEART AND DELILAH DOOM VS THE KILLER DEATH MACHINES

It was about time for this rivalry to boil over. After weeks of the Killer Death Machines picking on Doom and trying to convince her that Blackheart wasn’t loyal, they’re all meeting in the ring to hash it out. No way this could go wrong, right?

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Well, the match was total anarchy from the word go. Before the bell could even ring, Nevaeh and Havok vaulted out of the ring and attacked Doom and Blackheart. It was a bit difficult to follow the action until they made it into the ring. After a few minutes of pummeling, Havok tossed Doom into the ring and the bell ran. Nevaeh and Havok cut the ring in half fast, choking and kicking Doom and generally making her suffer. The Killer Death Machines really are an awesome tag team, and their efficient takedown of Doom was a brutal example of their teamwork. Shotzi was able to come in and deploy her amazing drop kick, but her revival was short-lived as the Killer Death Machines quickly overwhelmed her.

In the end, the Killer Death Machines pushed it too far. Blackheart made it back to her corner and landed the mother of all hot tags, awakening the Berzerker Doom we see in her championship matches. Doom unleashed a coast-to-coast knee offense that would put Daniel Bryan to shame, then Blackheart and Doom teamed up to finish off Nevaeh and win the match.

Unfortunately, even though Doom and Blackheart might have gotten the win, Killer Death Machines might have managed to drive a wedge between the two battling friends. After Havok and Nevaeh react to their loss by jumping Doom, Blackheart runs in to save the day. She manages to fight the two off, but in the process she accidently (?) smacks Doom in the face. Doom warily backs out of the ring, unsure of Blackheart’s intentions.

And honestly, so was I. I am still not sure if Doom can trust Blackheart!

And it may not matter, since Doom is injured and has to pull out of Rise of the Knockouts. At first, I hoped the injury was a story angle. Sadly, the disappointment expressed by Kevin Harvey and other friends of Doom makes it seem legit. It looks like RISE is just working with the injury and trying to move the story forward the best they can. Which really sucks, because I don’t want Doom to be actually injured! I wish her all the best, and I hope she recovers well and we see her back in the ring very soon.

Next: Fantasy Booking Mae Young Classic 2 Participants

Bad news about Doom aside, RISE fans have a lot to be excited about this weekend. Tag team champs to be crowned, rivalries to settle, and a brand new Phoenix of RISE. I’ll be in Naperville to watch it live, but if you can’t make it to Illinois, it will be streaming live on Twitch! See you for the fallout next week…

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